Why Not?

For my first day at my new job I wanted to wear this.

Not too shrewd on my part, just trying to be a little provocative given what I was expecting: a bunch of boys sitting around and talking in a warehouse environment. I figured I'd be in for a lot of overly firm handshaking and lots of half-nods in acknowledgment of each other, and probably terrible jock talk, you know, given the fact in Long Beach and Lakewood, there seems to be only one type of guy. So, I figured, what the fuck, you know, might as well make it a point to single myself our as different. Because, to be frank, I normally don't really care what my clothes says about me, but with dudes who work in a warehouse, they don't normally wear a light purple sweaters unless they're not straight. This time, I thought it might be useful and a little fun and, obviously, a way to throw some uneccessary source for gossip already, even still weeks out from our daily work days.

Turns out I couldn't wear it because I spilled coffee all over it first thing in the morning, so changed completely. Which is just as well: my first day at work wasn't what I was anticipating. And worst of all, across from me at the same table in the conference room, there was a particularly not straight Hispanic boy wearing the exact same sweater. Imagine the superfluous faux pas?! I laughed in my head when he sat down and introduced himself and I had to tell him I had the same sweater at home, and his eyes kind of opened a little wide, said, "Really?" and my not even wearing it, apparently, had a different unintended effect.